Happy Christmas, everyone! There's no real actual point in me publishing this tbh; cos literally, this post is exactly what it says on the tin... just me, ya friendly village knobhead, sending you some festive greetings.
I doubt anyone is gonna legit take time out of their Chrimbo Day to read my half-arsed excuse of a blog - let alone see this. But #YOLO. I took this photo of a star and by jove - I'm gonna use it for bloody something! I quite liked this image when I captured it [cos it's not entirely sh*t] and Instagram's plethora of bots and unfollowers didn't give it the love I felt it deserved; so here we are. Maybe it flopped with the bot society cos of the sly caption I put under it insinuating they're a bunch of d*cks, but who knows?
Regardless of whether you celebrate Christmas - or whether you even like it [I'll whole-heartedly admit it's not my fave time of year] I hope each & every one of you have a lovely December 25th. Even if the highlight of this date is - as it will most likely be for me - the Eastenders special.
ERMAGHERD, I hope nothing bad happens to erotic Josh.
My day will be a bit different this year, as I'm pretty fresh out of hospital & still sufficiently buggered; so I'm totes using this as an excuse to be extra Scroogey and miserable until at least Spring 2018.
I haven't put a tree up this year, I haven't watched a single festive film and I haven't listened to a single Christmas song lol ... but that's alright with me. I took part in a FAB Secret Santa, actually sent a few Christmas Cards [naturally, offensive AF ones from Love Layla] and I put red props in my Insta photos ... and that's me done for 2017, I think! Oh and the Squad and I have totes been remixing Christmas carols & songs in the group chat via voice-note; making them sufficiently vulgar & sexual. And I'm pretty clued up on gift guides, sales & places to get those gift inspo vibes cos yeno; I've spent all my time sat on me arse blogging about them or maxing out every available credit card I have on their websites.
But that's Christmas 2017, lads. And no matter how you spend it - or who you spend it with - I hope you have a right nice day.
Even if you decide to spend it in ya onesie, in bed, shovelling cookies in your mouth like you're a human dumpster & drinking red wine through a straw. Or working like an absolute trooper. Christmas means a lot of different things to a lot of different people - there's no right or wrong way to do it.
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