Sunday, 4 October 2015

Expectation vs Reality #7: Looking like Kimmy K for £5.99

Welcome to the latest post from my Expectation vs Reality series - let me quickly set the scene for you here, as it's been since a while since I dragged myself off my arse and wrote one of these beasts.

I am one of the poorest people in the land - if not all time ever. I'll hold my hands up high and admit that I am that girl; the one whose card has been declined for a solitary can of Smart Price tuna, who scavenges food off others like a massive tanned seagull and the kinda bird who sees a penny on the floor and has to pick it up - regardless of the high potential it has to be covered in scally urine [found 10p the other day in a pile of glass - WINNING!]

Combine this with the fact I have an uncontrollable urge to buy things, an addiction to online shopping and that I am also a self confessed eBay junkie - and you have the basis to this series [bargains are my equivalent of crack. Oh, as well those Coco Pops cereal bars, bourbon biscuits, cheese and the solitaire app I have on my phone.]

When I buy something - no matter how cheap it is - I want to know what I'm getting will be sh*t hot, not just plain old sh*t. But sadly, more often than not, that amazing looking playsuit you got for a quid and that looked pure fit on the model turns out to be nothing more than a sick joke with lace on.

This, my friends, is what the cool kids call an 'Expectation vs Reality' moment. You know what I mean; you order an absolute bargain online that looks like it's going to be a pure fitty, but then when it arrives... you don't know whether to laugh or cry because of how terrible it is. And sometimes, you just give up and do both; simultaneously. THAT. 

This series tests out some of the cheapest bargains of the internets, to see if they meet the expectations that their stock imagery suggests. Kind of like a cool Watchdog; with much less Anne Robinson and much more swearing.

Expectation vs Reality: Part #7 > The £1.49 Kim Kardashian Dress


Expectation > Black Long Sleeve Midi Bodycon Dress with Metal Trim [which I bought for £1.49 plus £4.50 postage] which came with a 4 week delay as it was shipped in from China.

I'm a size 12 and feeling optimistic, I also ordered a size 12 in this dress. This might not seem like a big thing or even a point worth making, but if you've read any of my previous Expectation vs Reality posts [and I highly recommend you do, although I am bias as hell] you'll know that Asian sizing is one massive gamble. Get it wrong and you'll end up donating whatever you bought to your pet to wear as a jumper.




*all stock imagery / screenshots from eBay listing

Reality > This was one of those rare occasions where I order in something for this series and don't do a little sick in my mouth whilst unwrapping it. It actually looks remotely like what it's supposed to look like. Say whaaaaaat?!



I'm a bit lost for words. It's usually during this part of my Expectation vs Reality posts where I go off on a mad tangent, waffling on about crepe paper, indecent exposure and toilet roll. But I don't have that many bad things to say about this. Especially for £1.49 plus postage.

I mean, one major downside with this little number is that it's a bit bloody tight. Maybe ordering a size 12 [the size I actually am] was a bit optimistic with Asia's sizing. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I am a firm believer that Asia's sizing is designed as one sick joke to make you feel like a giant mutant. But then again, it is bodycon and I have been eating A LOT of Bourbon biscuits recently, so maybe it's a bit my fault. 



It's quite nice, actually. The little metal bit above cleavage city is textured, which adds a classy looking twist. I mean, it is a bit cheap looking this metal bit, as it moves about a bit on the material - but can I complain for £1.49? No, not really. Though I do enjoy a good moan, like a pensioner.


Conclusion > It didn't quite make me into Kim Kardashian, but I have to say, I was pleasantly surprised by this dress. Wow, don't think I've ever typed that about clothing I've ordered for this series.

If you want to check out these Kimmy K knock offs, you can do so by having a search on eBay. They come in red too, but I'm not sure if that one might be pushing the boundaries of how far you can go buying el cheapo stuff from eBay and not looking like a hooker.


What are your thoughts? Have you had any epic 'Expectation vs Reality' moments with things you've bought online, or any amazing bargains off eBay?


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