Friday, 28 November 2014

It's #TMIFriday!

SO guys and dolls. It's #TMIFriday. An opportunity / raging excuse to get up close and personal with other bloggers. I personally believe that the best blogs are the ones that are real and show you a snapshot of the person behind the keyboard... no-one likes a keyboard warrior



Or worst still: a troll.

I'm not perfect. I laugh at myself about 12 times a day; usually for being a total IDIOT or for making myself laugh at my own jokes (I like to think I'm the most hilarious person I know.) And I'd never want to pretend to be perfect. I want to balance my blog between beauty and fashion ... and LIFE
I can't be one of these people who adopts a different persona online and makes out like their life is perfect. Cos mine, in all honesty, is a bit of a joke (hence why I'm always laughing!)

I strongly believe that you don't just post the good in a blog; you should post the bad too. EVERYONE just uses social media as a way to make themselves look perfect, don't they. Posting selfies of them at their best, posting how happy they are, about how great their relationship is, how beautiful their new coat is, how stable they are financially....

Don't get me wrong, I've done all of the above too (well... apart from I can't pout for shit & look deranged in most selfie efforts, my relationship is a sham, I can't wear my new coat cos I'm bedridden and my finances are more laughable than my jokes...) but I don't want to pretend I'm perfect. And that's why the #TMI tag is perfect; I can be ME

So until this gets going a bit and we can perhaps host #TMI chats on #TMIFridays and suggest topics for this week's #TMI, then I'm going to launch into this whole heartedly with a good old quiz, copied from FaceyB. I used to LOVE doing these on the 'Notes' application (remember old FaceBook when you genuinely had a 'wall' and your entire page was just filled with apps?) back when I was in Uni; they wasted so much time and I LOVED reading other people's cos they were so NOSEY and often filthy. So thought this would be a great place to start.

If anyone wants me to send them a quiz, I literally filled in about 25 over my time in Uni; so drop me an email or comment on this post with your deets and I'll send one your way. And before you start, check out my post here if you want to know about how #TMIFridays came about - there's some links to some great blogs in there - all of whom are also taking part in this festive friday fun this week!

#TMI - QUIZZY RASCAL - WEEK 1

1. Let's start out blunt, have you had sex in the last 12 hours?
THIS IS RUDE!!! But, as you will soon learn through my general ranting AND #TMIFridays posts, I have recently broken my hip (a whoooooooole other story) which means everything - let alone a dance with no pants - is off the table. PLUS my 'relationship' is a facsimile of a sham (shit) so chance would have been a fine thing. 3 months and counting. Not bitter. AT ALL. Honest.

2. Are you currently looking forward to tomorrow?
Yeah, why not hey. Another day, another dollar.

3. Are you wearing something that belongs to someone else?
Nope. I am wearing men's joggers. But they don't belong to a man; just the men's loungewear collection at Next. Bought these babies with my own store credit, taa very much #PoorPeoplesProblems

4. Where is your cell phone?
Sat next to me, why - you want to steal it?

5. Are your toes painted pink?
Nope and my toenails aren't either; they are currently modelling Rimmel London Velvet Matte in 013 Velvet Touch (which is just a dead posh way of saying 'Nah, they're grey lad.')

6. Would you rather have long or short hair?
Long. Here's a good #TMI overshare for you .. I haven't had a haircut in three years. It's in pretty good nick though ... if you wake up late EVERYDAY and don't have time to style it, the ends NEVER. DIE.  I'm like the Peter Pan of hair, living in neverland. Never, ever can I afford to get my haircut again, on this wage.

7. Would you rather break your arm or your leg?
BIT of an insensitive question after what's happened to me, FaceBook. But I can answer with 100% certainty that I would have taken an arm over this leg situation anyday. I CAN'T WALK, guys. I've not been allowed to shower for THREE MONTHS and I can't get in a bath tub. I have to wash with a flannel and hot water. It's like I'm living in the 1800s.

8. Are you tired right now?
Shattered mate.

9. Do you know anyone that smokes pot?
Yep, I know of quite a few raging stoners.
*LoveLaughsLipstick does NOT condone drug use. Unless they're prescription. In which case - guillltyyyyyyyy #PainkillerPete

10. Would you go out in public, looking like you do now?
YEAH. I've lost all my dignity these days; I used to have so much pride but then I broke a hip in a foreign country and within minutes was non-consensually naked in a room of Turkish (male) medics while I was prodded in all kinds of departments - so not one solitary shit is given these days!

11. Are your friends just like you?
Friends? What are these things? Food?

12. How are you feeling right now?
Tired, hungry, hurty, anxious ... yeno, a mix of all the most desirable emotions :|

13. Your phone is ringing. It's the person you fell hardest for, what do you say?
I'd only pick up if it was on withheld and I didn't know who it was. Those northern tones would soon give that fiend away. In which case I'd manage a 'Hello' and a '0-1-2-1-DO-ONE MATE!'

14. How many people do you trust with everything?
ONE. ME.

15. What was the last thing you drank?
I'm just slurping on a brew at the moment

16. Does anyone call you babe or baby?
Just mates, sarcastically. IMAGINE having someone who thought I was a babe haha.

17. Would you rather date someone older than you or younger?
TBH, both categories are dipshits so who cares. Younger fellas are clueless and the last 'older' boyfriend I had was so patronising; like I was some clueless little egg, that he got BINNED OFF. And the only other like markedly older romantic interest I had was this PYARRRRRR old man (40s) who managed a shop opposite one of my old works and on our joint Christmas Staff Night out we ended up club neckin' and then I ran off texting my mates about fossils. Hahahahahaah #SHAME #JagermeisterMadeMeDoIt

18. Has anyone upset you in the last week?
Yeah, I'm like a tap of emotions these days. I have so many feelings...*cries*

19. Have you ever suspected anyone of cheating on you?
Yeah, I'm para as SIN. Probably nothing to do with the fact that some douche bag I was with kissed someone else right next to me that time. Probs.

20. Ever been caught doing something illegal?
Never properly illegal like; more like sincerely frowned upon.

21. Relationships or one night stands? Relationships. Ones that aren't turd, please.

22. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?
YES. I've wanted a little star tattoo on my wrist for approximately 7 years. However, I'm too much of a chicken to get it done. Even after breaking a hip and having surgery and needles galore, I still well up in fear. Need to sort my life out, me haha. Though having said that, if I won't shell out £30 for a haircut and it's been three years, the likelihood of me encountering a spare £30 for a tattoo is as rare as ... well... a really endangered species.

23. How would you look with black hair?
Even worse than I do now. Partially dead probably, what with my complexion.

24. Are you stubborn?
.... as a MULE my dear friends: I am an arse. Or maybe I should say ass here and keep my donkey jokes going.

25. Are you waiting for anything?
A miracle, my friends.

26. What do you usually do right when you wake up?Mourn the end of my sleep and read my phone like I read the morning newspaper.

27. Do you find the opposite sex to be confusing?
Yes. And stupid.

28. Are you afraid of needles?
YES.

29. Do you mind sleeping on the floor?
Nah, I'm not fussy; just a massive sleep enthusiast.

30. Have you ever made someone so mad that they broke something?
Yeah, all the time. Probably not that normal either, on the whole.

31. In the past 24 hours, have you done something that you regret?
I haven't done anything FULL STOP. And anyway; no regrets, people. You should never regret something that once made you smile, even if it was ridiculous.

32. Have you ever been lied to by someone who you thought would never lie to you?
DAILY #LetDownLarry

33. Do you think a marriage can last forever?
I used to, when I wasn't so cynical. Now I can barely make a relationship last without some majorly dysfunctional breakdown and hatred all round, so starting to lose hope. I think when it's done for the right reasons, yes.

34. Do you get shy around people you're crushing on?
Not so much shy, more like THE BIGGEST GIMP EVER. Verbal diarrhoea... and then some.

35. Do you think that you have changed?
Er yeah. I never thought or imagined I'd be the person I am today, or be strong enough to get through all that I have. When I was in High School getting put down on the daily, I never thought I'd come to terms with my body and who I am. I still get hurtful remarks off random members of the public today, and MAAAAAN that hurts. But my self confidence and my comfort in my own skin has come on leaps and bounds since going to Uni; seriously, screw the debt and just go guys. Best thing that ever happened to me.

There you go. My first #TMI.

What would you like next week's topic to be? Is there a topic of #TMI you'd like to see either myself, or other bloggers cover?

Because this is the first week of #TMI and I've also not blogged as much as I'd like to recently... tonight, as the launch night will see a SECOND post follow shortly... involving third degree burns, my arse and getting frisked. Keep your eyes peeled, or follow me to keep up to speed ;}

As ever, leave your comments in the box below or tweet me.

Can't wait to read your posts ... tag me or tweet using the tag #TMIFridays!


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