Wednesday, 8 March 2017

Not Even Messing, Right, I Joined & ACTUALLY WENT To A Gym

... now that's a title I never thought I'd write. But legit, I have. I've joined Pure Gym and I've actually been inside a few times now too. Rather than just paying for it and not actually using it, adding another pointless direct debit onto my spiralling levels of debt. 

I've even been brave enough to go on my own, despite the fact I'm desperately out of shape and body conscious and don't know what most of the equipment even is [e.g. for the first week or so, I called the Treadmill the 'Walking Machine.']

Lovelaughslipstick Blog - Thoughts on joining Pure Gym, Exercise and Treadmill Dangers

I don't have many goals, other than I'd like to lose this belly I've developed and potench shrink my love handles a bit. And I want to strengthen up my legs and back; as after the accident, I've never really been back to full fitness. And pigs will fly, embark in successful corporate careers and get accepted for mortgages before I'll ever give up chocolate. So it's not like I'm overhauling my lifestyle that dramatically. But heading to the gym defo gives me something to do, and I can actually feel myself getting a bit addicted to it. 

Although some people leave really big, dramatic bum-crack sweat patches on the equipment and don't wipe them off and as a newly enrolled gym goer, this did / does upset me a bit.

In short, I'm not going to be writing as a fitness blogger any time soon. Or ever. 

But if you're looking for a cheap and productive way to burn off some steam and take your mind off the things that are bothering you, I can vouch that the gym actually isn't as evil a place as I always imagined it to be. Though I'll ALWAYS be wary of the treadmill, after the incident I witnessed in the gym I used to go to occasionally as a teenager. 

Treadmills ruin lives, kids

This poor sh*t right, was trying to impress us girls. He was on the treadmill and kept increasing the speed more and more and more, to show how athletic and manly he was. Except he wasn't. 

He couldn't cope so he tripped over, and the treadmill flung him backwards. He clung onto the edges of the treadmill and somehow managed to redeem himself [miraculously] and got back on his feet. But the treadmill wasn't quite done ruining his life yet.

He slipped again, whizzed backwards off the rotating treadmill floor and smacked against the wall at the opposite side of the room. Where he realised that the treadmill had pulled his pants down, and his bare bum and prize jewels were exposed to the world. He never came back.

Do you go to the gym? What are your fitness goals for 2017? Which one do you go to?
Lovelaughslipstick Blog - Thoughts on joining Pure Gym, Exercise and Treadmill Dangers
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